Winter has come to an end and we are on our way to a glorious Springtime.  Yet a part of me is holding on, terrified of losing it again. The changing of the seasons reminds me that Springtime too will come to an end, that Autumn and Winter will follow on again.

 

I believe that there is wisdom to be found in our own cyclical natures, reflected, as we are here in the Northern Hemisphere, by the natural world.

 

In our inner Spring we feel the bubbling up of inspiration; excitement and creativity in the Summer; satisfaction of completion and harvest in the Autumn; and the fertile void of Winter’s rest and recuperation, from which new ideas and growth can come.

 

I know all this and yet Springtime still wakes in me a very human desire to fear the loss of the feelings I’ve been craving for months. Summer will come, summer will end, and I will miss it when it’s gone again.

 

For people who have begun life in chaotic, unsafe environments, feeling good can be scary, self-esteem can be elusive, and feelings of pride and satisfaction are a bit risky. Things change and cannot be relied upon to last and, for those whose bodies hold painful stories, it is especially daunting to tempt the imagined fate of that raw pain all over again when the glow of the new has faded.

 

As Spring pushes new leaves and flowers into the sunshine, we are simultaneously faced with growth, excitement and newness, as well as fear of its loss.

And is this not the exquisite experience of being human?

Only what we truly love, will we truly miss when it’s gone.

Do I dare to let the sunshine in on this glorious Spring day?

Growing Me’s core value is to Let the Sunshine In, and yet, today as I contemplate what it truly means, I have fresh respect for what that might mean for the community we support.